Where have you been?!

I have been wallowing in self pity and depression. HaHa! (sounds so funny when I say it out loud). Okay so I missed last week's weigh in because I was up at Brighton and didn't get a chance. And then my life started getting crazy and stressful and I got really emotional and.... decided to quit. That's right. I decided to quit trying to lose weight because it's not happening. I know why it's not happening: I am not exercising regularly, I am eating too much food, etc. but I decided I can't eat less, and I can't exercise, it's just too hard, and there's too much going on. So I quit. I have quit trying physically before, just by eating too much or giving myself a "free" day, but never in my head. Well this week I quit in my head. It is just too much, too hard......Then last night I decided to give it another chance. I got to sleep early so I was well rested, had a wonderful dream about my vampire boyfriend, and woke up feeling much better. :)

I wanted to write how I feel because I think it's important to remember how I was feeling. I can't remember if I felt this way my "first time around" when I lost 30 pounds and I think it would have been helpful to know.

I am crossing things off my list today so I'm not so stressed about my acne face and braces, starting a new school, studying for the PRAXIS I, finding a place to live in a month, finances, and sending my best friend off to Iowa :(.

I am going to keep trying. I am going to start over new, like I've never had to do this before. I'm going to read over all my Weight Watchers pamphlets and start keeping track.

I will not be a quitter.